I go sleep while still get tonight

I going bed while um still tonight instead of awready tomorrow. Da house stay doing um late quiet. I going keep doing dis, cuz da version of me dat show up tomorrow stay getting decided right now, inside dis specific fifteen minutes, and not at any point tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning I only get fo work wit wat I stay given right hea.

Da lamp stay off and da street stay doing very little. Tomorrow still stay one long way off from hea, and dass precisely da point of getting in dis early. Get one book I nevah wen open and I stay completely fine about um. Da house get dat particular settled sound um make wen everyting inside um pau fo da day.

I stay up fo da hours nobody like from me, and den pay fo dem wit one version of myself dat everybody gotta deal wit. Dass one bad exchange rate and I been running um fo years wit no writing um down one time. Da late hours feel like da only ones dat genuinely mine, and az why I defend dem so junk kine. I not resting inside dem. I taking one loan against tomorrow and calling um freedom, and da interest on top um get paid by oddah people who nevah wen agree to da terms.

Da evening not getting stolen from me. I stay spending um, and da moment I could see um dat way I was able fo choose different wit no feeling deprived of notting at all. Dat one reframe wen do mo work den any amount of resolve eva wen manage. Tiredness no arrive announcing itself as tiredness. Um arrive as impatience, as one mo short fuse, as decisions I would not oddahwise make, and I hand all of dat to da people around me and den call um one bad day, like um wen come from nowea. Da cost of dis nevah land on me alone, and dass da part dat finally wen move me.

So I going set one alarm fo bedtime, not jus fo da morning. One alarm, at da hour I keep sailing straight past wit no noticing dat I wen. Da alarm, dat not one rule I stay imposing on myself and dat not one punishment. Dass information, arriving at da one moment I reliably not tracking da time on my own.

Inside bed, on purpose, while um still tonight. Tomorrow get one bettah me.