Ngishaya ucingo ebengiluqhelela

Ucingo selushayiwe. Selungemuva kwami manje, kanti igumbi lithule ngendlela elingakaze lithule ngayo emasontweni amaningi. Ngizokhumbula kahle ukuthi lwaba luncane kangakanani, ngoba ngizoyidinga leyo nkumbulo ngesikhathi esilandelayo lapho olunye lulele ekhalendeni lami lungakashaywa, luya ngokuya lusinda buthule. Kungakhathaleki ukuthi kwenzekani okulandelayo, ingxenye ebiyingeyami isiphelile. Ngenze into enzima ngesikhathi isanzima, okuyiso kuphela isikhathi lapho ukuyenza kubalwa khona. Imizuzu emine. Yilokho ebekuyikho ngempela.

Isandla sami sisafudumele ngenxa yokubamba ucingo. Lokho ebengizilungiselele kona akufikanga ngesimo engangisakhele sona. Ngiyaqaphela ukuthi ngimile, kanti angikhumbuli ngizinqumela lokho nakanye kule mizuzu embalwa edlule. Kukhona ingilazi yamanzi engayithela ngingakashayi, angizange ngiyithinte. Intambama yaphandle iqhubekile ingazi lutho ngokuthi kukhona okusanda kushintsha lapha ngaphakathi.

Ngakuzilolongela lokhu inyanga yonke. Zonke izinguqulo engangizicabanga zazihamba kabi, kanti akukho ngisho neyodwa kuzo eyake yenzeka, ngoba zazingasoze zenzeka. Yileyo ngxenye okufanele ngihlale nayo. Ingqondo yami yakhiqiza cishe imifanekiso engamashumi amathathu enemininingwane yenhlekelele, yangibiza inani eligcwele ngayinye yayo. Isenzo sangempela sathatha imizuzu emine, asizange sifane nangeyodwa kuzo. Ngakhokhela inyanga yonke ngento eyathatha imizuzu emine, kanti ngenza lowo mshintshiswano ofanayo izikhathi eziningi kunalokho engingathanda ukukubala ngokwethembeka.

Uvalo belulokhu lulukhulu kunocingo uqobo. Lokho kuyiqiniso cishe ngaso sonke isikhathi, kanti ukwazi lokho akulwenzi uvalo lube luncane, kodwa kwenza lubekezeleleke, okuwuhlobo lokusizwa oluhlukile nolusiza kakhulu. Uvalo akusona isibikezelo. Lungumxoxi onesiqiniseko esikhulu ongenakho nhlobo ukufinyelela emaqinisweni. Angidingi ukukholwa yilo ukuze ngithathe isinyathelo, kanti lowo musho wangithatha isikhathi eside ngendlela ehlazisayo ukuba ngifike kuwo. Ukulinda ngize ngiyeke ukuluzwa yiyo kanye indlela inyanga eguquka ngayo ibe unyaka, bese unyaka uphenduka ube yilokho okungenzeki nanini. Into engiyibalekelayo ikhula ngokulingana ncamashi nesikhathi engiyibalekela ngaso, bese incipha ngaso leso sikhathi engiyithinta ngaso.

Ngakho ngibhala phansi umusho wokuqala. Owokuqala kuphela. Bese ngishaya ucingo ngingakawufundi futhi, ngoba ukuphinda ukufunda yiwo kanye umshini owenza ukuthi lolu daba luhlehliselwe enye inyanga, kanti manje ngiyazazi ngalokho. Isikhala esiphakathi kokuwubhala nokushaya ucingo yisona sikhala lapho yonke imizamo yangaphambili yafela khona buthule. Ngivala leso sikhala ngamabomu, kulobu busuku, ngisakwazi ukusibona ngokucacile.

Kwenziwe. Hhayi ngobunono, hhayi ngokuphelele. Kwenziwe, okuyiyo yodwa inguqulo yakhona eyayizoke ibalwe. Yiyo leyo yonke indlela.