Bonus land, or refund, or the first salary wey big pass the last one well well. You work for am and you fit enjoy am. But you get like one week before e go melt into something wey you no fit even remember, and the only idea wey dey your head na better version of something wey you already get.
That upgrade na the worst buy for the whole list, and na your own experience tell you so. The sweet feeling from the last one last small weeks, then the new thing just become normal thing.
Money fit buy sweet feeling wey last, for true, but na for few shapes. The one wey dey last pass na money wey you spend on another person: the food wey you pay for, the course wey you sponsor, the bill wey you carry comot from your padi desk. Na practical talk about which buying you go still feel one year after, no be moral lecture.
Why the thing wey I buy for myself dey stop to sweet me quick quick?
Because you dey adapt to am, fast and complete, and adaptation na wetin your attention dey do to anything wey no dey change. Anything wey you own go turn background inside few weeks, na why upgrade of something wey you already get na the buying wey dey die fastest.
You fit test this pattern for yourself, no need any study. List your last five things wey you buy wey money enter well. Mark the ones wey you still dey notice. Almost every time, the ones wey survive na the ones wey change something for structure, and the ones wey die na the ones wey replace one working thing with another working thing wey just better small.
E no mean say make you stop to buy things for yourself, because that one na smaller life and this article no be about wanting less. E mean say make you sabi wetin you dey collect. Upgrade dey buy few sweet weeks, so price am honest as few sweet weeks, and if the weeks worth am, buy am.
How much I suppose give, and when I go decide am?
Decide the share before the money land, no be after. When you decide am before, na decision. When you decide am after, na mood, na why almost everybody wey dey wait to see wetin remain dey find say nothing remain.
This article no dey tell you wetin the share suppose be. No correct percentage dey, no threshold wey you must first pass, and anybody wey name figure for your own life dey guess. Wetin matter na say the number dey exist before the money exist, because share wey you name before go survive month wey your body no gree, but good intention no dey survive am.
The mechanics dull, and na the whole point. Name one share. Choose where e go go. If na money, make am standing transfer for one fixed date so e no go dey need decision again. If no be money, and plenty time e no go be, put am for the same page and give am the same date. The skill wey this whole category dey teach na to decide once, before, so hard month no fit renegotiate am, and giving na just the most useful place to practise that skill because nothing outside dey force you do am.
Wetin I suppose buy for myself with the rest?
Buy your time back first. Out of everything wey you fit buy for yourself, na only am dey return hours, and na hours you dey convert into the thing wey you dey build.
Research wey the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences publish about buying time find say when people use money remove work wey dem no like, dem dey report better life satisfaction, and for one field experiment, people talk say dem happy pass after buy wey save time than after buy wey na material thing. For real life, na the cleaning, na the commute, na the thing wey you dey do anyhow every Sunday afternoon. And one compounding version dey wey we must name: hours wey you buy back and spend on your own capacity, on training, on sleep, on one skill, dey pay you back for how much load you fit carry next year, no be just for how the next few weeks go feel.
Then three shapes wey dey hold. Experience with people wey you like, wey dey continue to pay because you go dey retell am. Small enjoyment wey dey come often instead of one big one wey come once, because frequency dey beat size when you dey fight adaptation. And delete one annoyance wey dey come every time, wey na the most underrated buy for the list because e remove small tax wey you bin dey pay every single week.
Wetin I fit give when money no dey spare?
Give the thing wey you sabi well well, and give am to one particular person. Most of the generosity wey dey return pass for working life no dey cost anything except mind. Na why e dey available for you tonight, no matter wetin the bonus be.
Our founder talk him own version plain. E say another secret to him success na giving back, say e dey always look for chance to coach, train, advise, lift person up, commend and champion the people wey dey him circle, and say the energy and support wey come back na tenfold. Na him account of him own twenty years, no be law about how the world dey settle account, and e do am the whole way up, no be after e don arrive, and na that part almost nobody dey do.
Five moves, all free, all doable this week. Do the introduction wey you for keep for yourself. Teach wetin you sabi, out loud, to somebody wey never get am, wey na also the fastest road to own am proper. Volunteer the skill wey dem dey pay you for, no be only your hours, because one afternoon of your expert work worth one week of general help. Tell junior colleague wetin you really dey earn, wey na one of the few sentence wey fit change wetin another person dey collect. And champion somebody wey no ask, wey no go ever hear, and wey no fit pay you back.
Who I suppose dey sponsor, and wetin I go talk?
Sponsor person by calling him name, and the exact thing wey e do, for room wey e no dey. Mentor dey give advice for coffee shop, but sponsor dey talk for the room where dem dey take decision, and plenty people never hear say difference dey.
This difference no be wording preference. The Harvard Business Review article about why men still dey get promotion pass women report the gap plain: companies dey invest plenty for mentoring their best talent and all that attention no dey turn into advancement, na why one woman inside am talk say dem don mentor am to death. Na for the room dem dey decide pay and opportunity. Na for coffee shop dem dey deliver advice. If na only the second one you dey do, you dey kind, and e no dey cost the other person anything and e no dey buy dem anything.
The public version na commending, and specificity na the whole technique. Vague praise na noise. Name the act, name am in front of the people wey their opinion matter for that person, and do am inside one week while everybody still remember. Gallup work on recognition find say the recognition wey people dey remember pass dey come from their manager or from senior leadership, e dey honest and personal, and e dey land best when e dey frequent and on time instead of when you save am up. Wey mean say the sentence wey you dey plan talk for the next meeting worth pass the thoughtful note wey you go eventually send.
Wetin this one dey do to the number for your app
Na here the part wey belong to money category instead of nice category. Person wey don decide say one fixed share dey go to another person don change wetin the balance mean when e open am.
Money wey you don choose to send somewhere get work. E be supply wey get use attached, and number wey get work easy to look for Tuesday night pass number wey be only running judgement on how you dey do. That one no be feeling, na procedural change: you don already decide wetin part of am dey for, so when you open the app you dey check plan, you no dey collect grade. People wey fit open the app without flinching dey negotiate better, dey wait longer, and dey make fewer expensive decision for speed, and this na one of the cheapest road to that kind steadiness.
So use the week wey you get. Name the share before the money move. Buy some hours back. Send one introduction and call one person name out loud for room wey e no dey. Then go earn more, because none of this na argument for smaller life. Na how the bigger one dey remain worth am.
Sources
- Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (PubMed Central), Buying time promotes happiness
- Harvard Business Review, Why Men Still Get More Promotions Than Women
- Gallup, The Importance of Employee Recognition: Low Cost, High Impact