Afotusɛm ntiantia
- Stop swiping in bed or half-awake.
- Take a real break to refill.
- Talk to yourself like a friend.
Brɛ su soronko bi wɔ hɔ a emfi da tenten mu. Efi anidaso a wɔkɔ so de san brɛ wo. Wode su bue app no, wo kokurobeti yɛ n'adwuma ketewa no, na baabi wɔ ɔkwan no so no ade no nyinaa gyaa sɛ ɛte sɛ kwan na ɛfii ase yɛɛ sɛ adwuma a ɛto so abien a woannya so kwan. Wo ho dwene ɔdɔ ho ara. Wode hwehwɛ no na abrɛ wo kɛkɛ.
Sɛ ɛhɔ na wowɔ a, ɛsɛ sɛ wuhu nneɛma mmienu fi mfiase. Wonsɛe, na wonni mu wo nko ara. Nhwehwɛmu kɔ so hu nhwɛso koro no ara: dating-app afohyɛ a wɔakyɛ no mu dodow no ara ka sɛ wɔabrɛ anaa wɔn ho atɔ wɔn wɔ adeyɛ no mu. Pew Research hui sɛ nnipa a wɔde app yi dii dwuma afe a etwaam mu no, bɛyɛ akron wɔ du biara mu na wɔn ani sɛee wɔ bere bi mu, na ɛyɛ taa sɛ wɔn ani sɛe sen sɛ wɔn ani gye. Brɛ no nyɛ nsɛnkyerɛnne sɛ woreyɛ no ɔkwan a ɛnteɛ so. Ɛyɛ taa sɛ sɛnea wɔahyehyɛ mpenatwe a mprempren no fi ase no.
Adɛn nti na ɛbrɛ wo titiriw
Ɛboa sɛ wobɛbɔ nea ɛrebrɛ wo ankasa din, efisɛ "mpenatwe" reyɛ adwuma pii sɛ asɛmfua baako. Nneɛma soronko kakra resi bere koro.
Nea edi kan ne dodow no ankasa. Profile biara yɛ gyinae ketewa, na app no de wɔn nnidiso a awiei nni mu ma wo. Adwene ho nimdefoɔ frɛ nea ɛsi no decision fatigue, sɛnea wo gyinaesi yɛ bɔne na w'aboterɛ yɛ tratraa bere a woboaboa gyinaesi ano nnidiso mu no. Susan Albers, adwene ho nimdefoɔ a ɔwɔ Cleveland Clinic, kyerɛ sɛ sɛ wode wɔn a wɔbɛyɛ ahokafoɔ totoo ho na wosan toto bio a, ɛhyɛ amene no so ankasa. Wonyɛ nkae a ɛyɛ hibii, abufuw nkate a ɛba swipe session tenten akyi no. Ɛyɛ adwene a abrɛ, ɛnyɛ mfomso a ɛwɔ wo suban mu.
Nea ɛto so abien ne abufuw a ɛkyim. Nkrasɛm pa, na afei komm. Date a edi kan a eye, na afei hwee. Format no kyerɛ wo sɛ fa anidaso kakra to mu mpɛn pii, na gye ɔhwere ketewa pii. Asram pii akyi no, saa ɔhwere ketewa no boaboa ano yɛ biribi a ɛte sɛ awerɛhow, ɛmfa ho sɛ biribi kɛse "ansi" da.
Nea ɛto so abiɛsa no kyim kɛse. Wɔayɛ app no sɛ wɔbɛde dwuma, ɛnyɛ sɛ ɛbɛyi wo afi mu. Ɛyɛ mmerɛw sɛ swiping bɛsiane afi obi a worehwehwɛ no akɔ ɔkwan a wode dwudwo adwene a ɛyɛ den mu, biribi a wode wo nsa ka bere a woato w'asom anaa woyɛ ankonam anaa wode hibii. Sɛ therapist Sari Cooper ka no, swiping bɛyɛ mood-regulation adeyɛ sen abusuabɔ ho hwehwɛ. Sɛ saa dane no si a, wubetumi de bere ne ahoɔden pii ayɛ adwuma na awiei no wote nka sɛ wo ho nyɛ wo den, ɛnyɛ sɛ woabɛn obiara.
Eyinom mu biara nkyerɛ sɛ woyɛ atirimɔdenni anaa ɔdɔ awu. Ɛkyerɛ sɛ adwinnade no ano yɛ den na adeyɛ no hwere ade, na mmuae a abrɛ a wode ma no yɛ nea adwene wɔ mu.
Wowɔ ho kwan sɛ wugyae bere kakra
Eyi ne kyɛfa a nnipa fa fa so, efisɛ ɛte sɛ woregyae. Sɛ wugye home a, ɛnyɛ sɛ woregyae ɔdɔ ho hwehwɛ. Ɛyɛ ɔhwɛso.
Sɛ woabrɛ a, wode wo brɛ kɔ date so, a woda so pɛ sɛ biara di nkogu sɛnea wubetumi akɔ fie. Wokenkan text a ɛyɛ pɔtɔɔ sɛ po. Wonyɛ obi a wo ho yɛ dɛ sɛnea woyɛ ankasa, na bere a wonya no nyɛ dɛ sɛnea ɛfata wo. Ahome ankasa, nnawɔtwe mmienu, ɔsram baako, bere bi, ma abura no san hyɛ ma. Albers afotu no da hɔ pefee: sɛ wote nka sɛ woabrɛ anaa wo bo afu a, twe wo ho, a wonnyaw mpenatwe koraa. Botae no ne sɛ wobɛsan aba sɛ wo ankasa, ɛnyɛ brɛ no a ɛrekura no denneennen.
Home no yɛ adwuma bere a ɛyɛ ankasa nko ara. Yi app no fi wo fon so, anaa kari no fi anim screen no so na dum notification no. Ka kyerɛ adamfo bi sɛ woregye home sɛnea ɛbɛyɛ a worensan nware mu anadwo nnɔn 11 esiane ankonam nti. Afei, na eyi ne home no ankasa asɛm no, fa bere a woagyae no hyɛ nneɛma a ɛhyɛ wo ma sen sɛ ɛyiyi wo no mu. Hyia nnipa a wɔdɔ wo dada no. Ma wo nipadua nkɔ. Yɛ biribi. Botae no nyɛ sɛ "yɛ adwuma fa wo ho so" sɛnea wobɛfata ɔdɔ. Ɛyɛ sɛ wobɛkae sɛ wo asetena yɛ ahokafoɔ pa ne ho ankasa.
Sɛ wosan ba a, fa ketewa bra
Sɛ wosan ba, na bere a wosan ba a, mmuae no taa nyɛ pii, ɛyɛ kakra na ɛyɛ brɛoo. Nneɛma kakra tew adesoa no so ankasa:
- Fa ban twa ho. Paw bere, ka sɛ simma aduasa, anwummere kakra wɔ nnawɔtwe mu, na fi app no mu bere a aka no. Cooper kyerɛ pɔtee sɛ swipe wɔ mpa so ansa na woada anaa anɔpa a wonya nyan kɛkɛ no, bere a wo ho ntumi nni nkate a ɛsɔre no so kɛse no. Fa no sɛ adwuma a ɛwɔ mfiase ne awiei, ɛnyɛ tab a abue wɔ w'adwene mu.
- Papayɛ esi dodow ananmu. Wonhia match ɔha. Wuhia nkɔmmɔbɔ kakra a ɛkɔ baabi ankasa. Eye sɛ woswipe wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ pɛpɛɛpɛ kɛse na woma nea aka no twam.
- Kɔ asetena ankasa mu ntɛm. Texting a awiei nni mu ne baabi a ahoɔden kɔ owu. Sɛ obi te sɛ ɔbɛyɛ ye a, fa nhyiamu tiawa a ɛho nyɛ den to gua ntɛm sen akyiri. Kɔɔfe ntɛm ka pii kyerɛ wo wɔ simma aduonu mu sen texting nnawɔtwe abiɛsa.
- Mma app no nyɛ ɔkwan koro no ara. Akwan bi a ɛrengye wo ho pii a wode hyia nnipa no fa nneɛma a anka wobɛyɛ no mu, adesua, ɔboayɛ adwuma, nnamfo nnamfo. Nhyɛso a esua, baabi ankasa, scoreboard biara nni hɔ.
- Hyɛ wo nipadua no nsow. Koko mu a emu yɛ den anaa abogye a wɔakata ano bere a woswipe no yɛ amanneɛ pa. Ɛno yɛ wo sistim a ɛreka kyerɛ wo sɛ woanya dodow a ɛsɛ ɛnnɛ. Tie no ansa na woahyew.
Bɔ wo ho nkate a wowɔ ho ban
Ɔsɛe a ɛyɛ komm a mpenatwe brɛ de ba ne nea ɛyɛ sɛnea wohwɛ wo ho. Komm ne baabi a ɛnkɔ baabiara pii akyi no, ɛyɛ mmerɛw sɛ wofi ase kenkan ade no nyinaa sɛ atemmu, te sɛ nea mmuae a enni hɔ no resusuw wo bo a ɛsom. Ɛnte saa. Swipe yɛ ɔhɔho a ɔregye mfonini kakra ne kasamu baako so akyi, wɔ platform a wɔayɛ sɛ ɛbɛma wɔakɔ so ahwɛ atwa wo ho so. Ɛno nyɛ nsɛm a ɛfa sɛ wofata ɔdɔ anaa wonfata ho.
Albers ka no pefee: wo bo a ɛsom no nkyekyere match yi nsɛm a efi mu ho. Kura saa mu, efisɛ ɛno ne ade a process no di kan sɛe. Bɔ mmɔden ma nteaseɛ ti kakra a ɛho biara nfa ɔdɔ ho ntena hɔ, adwuma a ɛfa wo, ayɔnkofa a emu dɔ, biribi a worekɔso reyɛ no yiye. Nnipa a wɔkora asetena a ɛyɛ ma bere a wɔreyɛ mpenatwe no taa gyina po no ano yiye, fã bi efisɛ obua a obi mmua no nyɛ ade pii.
Ɛboa nso sɛ wo ne wo ho kasa sɛnea wobɛkasa akyerɛ adamfo a ɔrefa ade koro no ara mu. Worenka nkyerɛ no sɛ obi mfata ɔdɔ efisɛ ɔbarima bi aghost no. Wobɛka sɛ ne hwere ne, na ɛbɛyɛ wo nokware. Yɛ wo ho saa ayamye no ara. Ɛte sɛ ɛyɛ brɛoo. Ɛyɛ ankasa nea ɛma wo ka agorɔ no mu a ɛrengye wo ho a wobu wo ho.
Bere a brɛ dan biribi a emu yɛ duru
Mpenatwe brɛ dodow no ara sɔre denam home ankasa ne su a ɛyɛ brɛoo so. Ɛtɔ da no ɛkyerɛ biribi a ɛsõ, na ɛno fata sɛ wofa no aniberɛ so sen sɛ wopia mu.
Sɛ ehu no atrɛw afi mpenatwe so akɔ wo asetena nkae mu, sɛ wote nka sɛ wo bo asom bere biara, anidaso nni hɔ, ahopopo, anaa wonte hwee, sɛ wo ani agyae nneɛma a kan no na w'ani gye ho, anaa sɛ wuhu wo ho sɛ wode app no di dwuma a ɛte sɛ ɔhyɛ mpo bere a ɛma wote nka sɛ wo ho nyɛ wo den a, ɛno yɛ nsɛnkyerɛnne sɛ ka biribi kyerɛ obi. Therapist betumi aboa wo ma woahu nea ɛyɛ mpenatwe brɛ ne nea ebia ɛyɛ awerɛhow anaa ahopopo a ahyɛ mpenatwe ntamadeɛ. Ɛnonom gye mmoa yiye, na ɛnsɛ sɛ wo nko ara hu nea ɛyɛ deɛ. Sɛ wofrɛ mmoa a, ɛnyɛ sɛ woyɛ adwuma boro so. Ɛyɛ instinct koro no ara a ɛmaa wobrɛɛ fi mfiase, kyɛfa a ɛwɔ wo mu a enim sɛ ɛfata wo sɛ wote nka yiye sen eyi.
Sɛ wopɛ ɔhokafoɔ na wuhia home fi ɔhwehwɛ no mu no nyɛ atia ho. Wubetumi apɛ ade no na woda so de adwinnade no ato fam bere kakra. Ɔdɔ a worehwehwɛ no, bere biara ne sɛnea ɛbɛpue no, wo a woahome bedi no yiye sen wo a woabrɛ no.
Nea efi mu
- Pew Research Center, The experiences of U.S. online daters
- Cleveland Clinic, Dealing With Dating App Despair
- Psychology Today, Swiping With Agency: Beating Dating App Fatigue