Afotusɛm ntiantia
- Go no contact, mute the reminders.
- Ride the urge out for twenty minutes.
- Write down why it really ended.
Anka ɛbɛyɛ mmerɛw koraa sɛ wʼani agye fi ɔdɔ mu a. Ɛno a anka ofi no bɛyɛ nkrataa ho dwuma kɛkɛ. Ɔfa a ɛyɛ tan no ne sɛ atenka no da so ara wɔ hɔ, ɛyɛ mu nyinaa, na ɛkyerɛ obi a ɔremma bio. Wo werɛ fi no wɔ bere a ɛnyɛ pɛ. Woteɛ wo nsa wɔ wo fon so sɛ wobɛka biribi ketewa akyerɛ no. Wode nna pa no fa wʼadwene mu na woyi nna bɔne no fi mu. Na wo mu fa bi da so ara retwɛn, mpo bere a wunim yiye.
Sɛ ɛhɔ na wowɔ seesei a, wonyɛ mmerɛw na wonsɛe. Woyɛ onipa a ne koma annya nkra no. Saa ntam akwan, a ɛda nea wunim ne nea wote nka ntam, no na ɛyɛ ɔhaw no nyinaa. Na ɛyɛ ade a ɛda adi.
Momma yɛnka nea enti a ɛyɛ den saa ho asɛm, na afei nea wobɛyɛ bere a ɛkɔ so no.
Wʼamene refa eyi sɛ aduru a wode wo ho ato so a wode regyae
Ade bi wɔ hɔ nti a obi ho hia betumi ate sɛ akɔnnɔ sen awerɛhow.
Nhwehwɛmufo a nnipa ho nimdefo Helen Fisher dii anim no de nnipa a na wɔapo wɔn nkyɛe, na wɔkae sɛ wɔda so ara dɔ wɔn paa, hyɛɛ amene nhwehwɛ afidie mu na wɔde onipa a wagyaw no mfonin kyerɛɛ wɔn. Amene afaafa a ɛsɔ ogya no nyɛ nea ɛfa awerɛhow ho nko. Ɛyɛ afaafa a ɛfa akatua, mpɛ, ne akɔnnɔ ho, ebi a ɛyɛ amene afidie koro no ara a ɛsɔ ogya bere a obi ho ahyere no aduru bi na ɔpɛ ne foforo no. Wɔn a wɔboaa no kae sɛ wɔde wɔn nna mu dɔnhwerew bɛboro mpɛnkoraha aduɔwɔtwe anum dwene onipa a ɔde nneɛma baa awiei no ho.
Tena ho kakra, efisɛ ɛyɛ nwonwa sɛ ɛma wo ho da hɔ. Nea enti a wuntumi nsi gyinae kɛkɛ sɛ woaforo no ne sɛ wʼamene fa bi refa onipa yi sɛnea anka ɛbɛfa biribi a wʼonipadua hwehwɛ no. Anidaso nyɛ suban mu mfomso. Ɛyɛ akɔnnɔ nhyehyɛe a ɛreyɛ nea ɛnyinyii sɛ ɔnyɛ pɛpɛɛpɛ.
Ɔfa a ɛho hia sen biara ni. Wɔ saa nhwehwɛmu koro no ara mu, amene adwuma a ɛbata abɛnabɛn ho no yɛɛ komm bere a bere pii kɔ so wɔ ntetewmu no akyi. Twe no nyera da a edi kan. Ɛdwo. Ɛnyɛ sɛ woahyɛ no, na mmom efisɛ saa na saa nhyehyɛe yi yɛ bere a wogyae no aduan ma.
Di ho yaw te sɛ hwere a ɛyɛ no
Yɛtaa fa asɛm "su" yɛ owu de. Nanso daakye a woaboaboa ano dada a wohwere no yɛ hwere ankasa, na ɛhwehwɛ nea owu hwehwɛ no ara. Ɛsɛ sɛ wote nka ansa na woawie.
Ɛno kyerɛ sɛ woma awerɛhow no ba mmom sen sɛ wobeguan afi ho. Su sɛ ɛba a. Bo fuw sɛ ɛba a. Kyerɛw nkrasɛm tenten a worenfa nkɔ na fa hyɛ wo nsam. Atenka a wopo sɛ worente nka no nkɔ; ɛtwɛn kɛkɛ. Nnipa a wɔma wɔn ho kwan ma wɔfa awerɛhow no mu, asorɔkye so, a bere pɔtee biara nni hɔ, no taa pue fi ɔfa baako no ntɛm sen nnipa a wɔde wɔn nsa kura mu denneennen na wɔfrɛ no ahoɔden.
Nanso nsonsonoe wɔ atenka ne nea wokɔ so twa ahyia ntam. Awerɛhowdi tu kɔ anim. Nea wukura mu daa no kɔ so twa ahyia. Sɛ wuhu sɛ woadi dɔnhwerew biako resua nkae abiɛsa koro no ara anaa woresiesie asɛm koro no ara a ɛkyerɛ sɛ wɔbɛsan aba a, ɛno ne kanea no, na kanea no ma kuru no ano da hɔ. Sɛ wuhu no a, nyɛeɛ no nyɛ sɛ wobɛka wo ho anim. Ɛyɛ sɛ wode wʼadwene to wo nipadua anaa nea atwa wo ho ahyia no so brɛbrɛ, na woayɛ ade ketewa baako ankasa. Sɔre. Pue fi adi. Frɛ obi.
Twe akɔnnɔ no nnuan brɛbrɛ
Ɛha na anammɔn a ani da hɔ no boa kɛse, na ɛha na ɛyɛ den sen biara.
Adwenemu akwahosan ayaresafo ka eyi tee: sɛnea wubetumi biara no, kɔ nkitahodi mu (no contact). Nkrasɛm biara, wɔn krataafa a wonhwɛ, woforo nkɔfa wɔn fie ho, "yɛnyɛ nnamfo kɛkɛ" bere a wo koma da so ara abue tee no. Etumi ate sɛ nwini, atirimɔden a wode yɛ wo ho mpo. Ɛnte saa. Bere biara a woteɛ wo nsa sɛ wobɛnya wɔn aduru bi no, woma saa nhyehyɛe a ɛma woda yaw mu no aduan, na wosan kanea no sɛnea ɛbɛyɛ komm. Afotufo taa kyerɛ sɛ ma no bere ankasa, adapɛn pii anaa abosome kakra, ansa na wobesi gyinae sɛ nkitahodi biara fata mpo.
Nneɛma kakra na ɛma nkitahodi a ɛnni hɔ no yɛ nea wubetumi atena ase mu sen sɛ ɛyɛ yaw kɛkɛ:
- Yɛ komm anaa gyae wɔn akyidie sen sɛ wobɛsiw wɔn kwan a ano yɛ den, sɛ kwansiw a ɛyɛ pɛpɛɛpɛ yɛ wo den dodo a. Botae no ne sɛ nkae bɛyɛ kakra, ɛnyɛ asɛm a wode reka.
- Fa nneɛma a ɛkae wo no sie seesei. Ataade no, nnwom no, mfonin no. Ɛnsɛ sɛ wohyew biribiara. Adaka a ɛwɔ dan mu dɔɔso.
- Si gyinae ansa wɔ nea wobɛyɛ wɔ anwummere nnɔn akron mu bere a wo koma pɛ sɛ woteɛ wo nsa no. Nantew, adamfo pɔtee a wubetumi akyerɛw no mmom, sini a wode sie ma saa bere no nko.
- Bere a akɔnnɔ no ba a, bɔ mmɔden sɛ wobɛtwɛn no simma aduonu ansa na woayɛ ho biribi. Akɔnnɔ kɔ soro san ba fam. Pii twam sɛ woanhwie ngo angu so a.
Na di asɛm a woka kyerɛ wo ho wɔ bere a wo ho yɛ mmerɛw no ho nokware. Anidaso wɔ ɔkwan a ɛfa so siesie abusuabɔ no kosi sɛ mmeae pa no nko ara na aka. Sɛ ɛboa a, kyerɛw nea enti a ɛsɛe no ankasa, pefee, na kenkan saa nhwehwɛ no bere a kae a ɛyɛ dɛ no hyɛ ase resakra abakɔsɛm no.
Hwɛ nipadua a ɛsoa eyinom nyinaa no so
Bere a wo koma abu no, nneɛma a ɛho hia titiriw no te sɛ ɛho nhia. Ɛnte saa. Ɛsoa adesoa no.
Komaabu ka nipadua, ɛnyɛ atenka no nko. Nna sɛe, ɛkɔm yera anaa ɛyɛ basaa, biribiara yɛ duru. Ɛnsɛ sɛ wote nka sɛ wopɛ ansa na woayɛ nneɛma nketewa no. Ɛsɛ sɛ woyɛ no kɛkɛ. Di aduan a ɛyɛ nokware. Pue kɔ awia mu. Ka wo nipadua kakra mpo. Ma wo nna nya nhyehyɛe bi, efisɛ dɔnhwerew a hwee nni mu no na sɛe no te.
Twe wo ho fi akwan a ɛda adi a wofa so guan no nso. Nsã baako anaa abiɛsa fura ɔyaw no adwene anwummere baako, na ɛtaa gyaw wo wɔ fam adekyeɛ, na ɛma anwummere nnɔn akron nkrasɛm no yɛ nea ɛbɛba ntɛm. Sɛ woma wo ho yɛ den a, ɛma awerɛhowdi gyina; ɛnma ɛnkɔ.
Brɛoo dane onipa a wadi mu bio
Sɛ wodɔ obi paa a, wʼasetena nyin twa ne ho hyia. Ne nea ɔpɛ, ne nhyehyɛe, su a na wowɔ bere a ɔwɔ ho. Enti ɔfa a ɛyɛ yaw no nyɛ ne ho a wo werɛ fi no nko. Ɛyɛ sɛ wuntumi nhu pɛpɛɛpɛ onipa a woyɛ a ɔnni dan no mu.
Eyi nso ne ɔfa a anidaso wom komm. Adwuma no seesei ne sɛ wobɛsan agye saa kwan no, ade ketewa baako bere koro mu. Fa biribi a ɛyɛ wo nko dea so, ade a na ɔnni mu koraa. Hu nnamfo a wotwee wɔn ho bere a na wo ne obi wɔ hɔ no. Pene nhyehyɛe a anka woannyɛ no daa so. Emu biara renyɛ ade a ɛdɔɔso fi mfiase. Yɛ no nso ara. Worenhwehwɛ sɛ wode biribi besi nea woahwere no ananmu. Wokae wo ho sɛ woyɛ onipa a wadi mu wɔ wo nko, nea, baabi a ɛwɔ eyinom nyinaa ase no, woyɛ dada.
Bere a wode wo ho bɛto biribi a ɛboro bere so
Komaabu a efi ntetewmu mu fata sɛ ɛyɛ yaw, na ɛsɛ sɛ ɛdwo, a ɛnyɛ pɛ, wɔ adapɛn ne abosome mu. Ɛno ne sɛnea ɛkɔ daa. Nnamfo ne abusua yɛ ɔfa a wode fa mu kɔ; ma nnipa a wɔdɔ wo no mmra ankasa, mpo bere a wo nko ara tena yɛ mmerɛw no.
Nanso ɛtɔ da a, ɛboro nea adamfo betumi akura. Sɛ adapɛn retwam na wonkɔ baabiara, sɛ wuntumi nyɛ adwuma wʼadwumam anaa wunni aduan anaa wonna, sɛ woagyae nneɛma a na ɛho hia kan no ho dwene, anaa sɛ ɛyaw no afi emu yɛ duru akɔ baabi a wote nka sɛ wompɛ sɛ wote ase a, ɛno ne bere a wode wo nsa kɔ onimdefo so. Ayaresafo pa nyɛ sɛnkyerɛnne sɛ wo werɛ fi no mu woadi nkogu. Wɔyɛ obi a wɔatete no sɛ ɔbɛboa wo ma woasoa eyi na woasan asiesie wo ho, na komaabu a efi ntetewmu mu yɛ ade a wɔsa no bere biara. Sɛ wote nka da sɛ wonni banbɔ wɔ wʼadwene mu a, ntwɛn no wo nko ara. Fa wo nsa kɔ ahohia ho telefon anaa obi a wugye no di so nnɛ.
Worenya saa atenka yi daa, mpo bere a seesei wo nipadua nyinaa gye di sɛ wobɛyɛ saa. Ɔdɔ no betumi agye bere tenten ansa na asa, na ebia ɛrensa koraa da. Ɛyɛ pɛ. Wuda so ara betumi akyekye asetena pa wɔ ne nkyɛn. Ɛyaw no yɛ ketewa. Wo dane kɛse. Adekyeɛ daa bi, bere bi a efi nnɛ, wubehu sɛ ɛnyɛ no na wudwen kan, na wobɛte ase sɛ ɛmu yɛ den sen biara no atwam dada.
Nsɛm a wɔnyaa firii hɔ
- Cleveland Clinic, How To Get Over a Breakup: 11 Tips for Healing
- Rutgers University, Study Finds Romantic Rejection Stimulates Areas of Brain Involved in Motivation, Reward and Addiction
- HelpGuide.org, Coping with a Breakup or Divorce