Skip to main content
Ingabe usenkingeni noma ucabanga ukuzilimaza? Awuwedwa. Thola ucingo losizo →
Nikela

UMSEBENZI NESIKOLE · UKUSEBENZA

Indlela Yokuzola Ngaphambi Komzuzu Omkhulu

Inhlolokhono, inkulumo, umculo, uvivinyo. Nakhu okwenzekayo emizuzwini ngaphambi kokuba ungene, nezinto ezimbalwa ezikuzinzisa ngempela uma iwashi seliphelelwa isikhathi.

Iqoqo lamabhodlela ahleli phezu kwetafula eduze kwamatshe

Isithombe sithathwe ngu-Mockup Free ku-Unsplash

Amathiphu asheshayo

  • Zitshele uthi "ngijabule," hhayi "ngikhathazekile".
  • Phefumulela ngaphakathi ubale kune, phandle kuyisithupha.
  • Bheka phezulu naphandle egumbini.

Kunohlobo oluthile lokwesaba oluvela ngaphambi kwento ebalulekile. Umlomo wakho uyoma. Inhliziyo yakho iyasheshisa. Ufunda umugqa ofanayo wamanothi akho izikhathi ezine kodwa awukho ongenayo. Ungahle usumile ephaseji, noma uhleli emotweni epakiwe, noma ulinde ukuthi igama lakho libizwe, kanti izwi elisekhanda lakho limatasa libala yonke into engahamba kabi.

Kungaba yinhlolokhono. Kungaba isethulo kubantu abanquma izinto. Ukuqomisana kokuqala, umculo, ukuhlolwa kokugcina, ingxoxo enzima obuyihlehlisile. Imininingwane iyashintsha. Impendulo yomzimba iyafana ngokumangalisayo, kanjalo nombuzo ongaphansi kwayo: ngizoyidlula kanjani imizuzu embalwa elandelayo ngaphandle kokuhlakazeka?

Into yokuqala efanele ukwaziwa: lokhu akusona isibonakaliso sokuthi awuzilungiselele, noma ubuthakathaka, noma usuzokwehluleka. Kuwumzimba wakho owenza ncamashi lokho imizimba ekwenzayo uma into izwakala ibalulekile. Inkinga akuwona umuzwa. Inkinga yilokho esivame ukuzama ukukwenza ngawo.

Iningi lethu, kulowo mzuzu, lifinyelela emyalelweni ofanayo. Zola. Futhi cishe awukaze usebenze.

Kungani ukuthi "zola nje" kuphenduka kubi

Uma izinga likhuphuka, uhlelo lwakho lwezinzwa lugxuma luye esimweni sokuqapha okuphezulu. Izinga lokushaya kwenhliziyo liyakhuphuka, ukuphefumula kuyasheshisa, igazi liya emisipheni yakho. I-Cleveland Clinic ichaza ukukhathazeka kokusebenza njengempendulo yokulwa noma ukubaleka ithatha isikhundla, izintambo ezindala ezifanayo ezake zasiza okhokho bakho ukubaleka entweni enamazinyo. Iyaxokozela, ingeyomzimba, futhi ayivali ngoba uyicele ngenhlonipho.

Nansi ingxenye eshintsha yonke into. Leso simo esinyusiwe, inhliziyo egijimayo, amandla azumayo, ukugxila okucijile, cishe kufana ncamashi nalokho umzimba wakho okuzwayo uma ujabule. Injini efanayo. Umehluko wodwa wangempela yindaba oyixoxayo ngakho.

Umcwaningi wase-Harvard okuthiwa u-Alison Wood Brooks wakuvivinya lokhu ngqo. Kolunye ucwaningo, abantu abasezocula i-karaoke phambi kwabantu abangabaziyo batshelwa ukuthi basho into eyodwa kwezimbalwa ngokuzwakalayo kuqala. Iqembu elathi "ngijabule" lathola cishe amaphesenti angu-80 kuphimbo, isigqi, nevolumu. Iqembu elathi "ngikhathazekile" lathola amaphesenti angu-53. Uvalo olufanayo, umphumela ohluke kakhulu, futhi into wodwa eshintshile amagama amathathu. Wathola iphethini elifanayo ngabantu abanikeza izinkulumo nabantu abenza uvivinyo lwezibalo olunzima. Labo abathi "ngijabule" ngaphambi kokukhuluma babonakala benokugqugquzela, benekhono, futhi bekhululekile kubantu ababebabuka. Labo abaqondisa kabusha ngaphambi kovivinyo lwezibalo bathola amaphuzu aphakeme kuneqembu elatshelwa ukuthi lihlale lizolile. Ukuzama ukuzikhulumela ekuzoleni kucela umzimba wakho ukuthi ushaye amabhuleki usuka esivinini esigcwele. Ukuqondisa kabusha amandla afanayo njengokujabula kuwakhomba nje endaweni ewusizo.

Ngakho umgomo kuleyo mizuzu embalwa yokugcina ngokuvamile akusona ukungezwa lutho. Kuwukuzwa ukukhuphuka ukuvumele kusebenze kuwe. Uvalo oluncane empeleni luyakucija. Lugcwalisa uhlelo lwakho ngokugxila, lukwenze ushesheke ezinyaweni zakho, lukusize unakekele ngokwanele ukwenza into kahle. Abadlali nabasubathi obabukayo abezwa lutho ngaphambi kokuba baqhubeke. Bavele bafunda ukufunda umuzwa njengokulunga esikhundleni sesexwayiso.

Imizuzu embalwa ngaphambili: zolisa umzimba kuqala

Awukwazi ukucabanga uphume esimweni somzimba. Kufanele unike umzimba isignali kuqala, futhi esheshayo, ethule kunazo zonke ngumoya wakho.

Isinyathelo esiwusizo kunazo zonke ukwenza ukuphefumulela phandle kwakho kube kude kunokuphefumulela ngaphakathi. Phefumulela ngaphakathi ubale kuze kube kune, bese uphefumulela phandle kancane ubale kuze kube kuyisithupha. Ukuphefumulela phandle okude yikho okutshela uhlelo lwakho lwezinzwa ukuthi isimo esiphuthumayo siphelile. Kwenze lokhu kane noma kahlanu. Akekho oseduze kwakho ozoqaphela, okukwenza kufaneleke egumbini lokulinda noma eceleni kwesiteji.

Uma ukuphefumula kwakho sekuvele kuzwakala kufushane futhi kubambekile, zama ukuphefumulela ngaphakathi kabili ngaphambi kwaleyo ndlela ende yokuphefumulela phandle: ukuphefumula okujwayelekile ngamakhala, umqhubuzo wesibili omncane womoya phezu kwako, bese udedela kancane ngomlomo. Lowo mqhubuzo wesibili omncane uphinda ukhukhumeze amaphaphu futhi uvame ukuzolisa uhlelo olugijimayo ngokushesha kunokuphefumula okujulile okukodwa. Okumbalwa kwalokhu okulandelanayo kungakususa ekungajulini nasekugijimeni kuye entweni ongasebenza ngayo.

Uma unesikhathi esithe xaxa sobumfihlo, ukunyakaza nakho kuyasiza. I-Cleveland Clinic iveza ukuthi ukuvusa ngokomzimba izingalo zakho, ukugingqa amahlombe akho, noma ngisho ukwenza ama-jumping jack ambalwa kungasha ukushwabana kokuvevezela kusho emzimbeni wakho ukuthi uphephile. Izilwane zikwenza lokhu ngokwemvelo emva kokwethuka. Thina imvamisa sikhohlwa ukuthi sivunyelwe.

Okunye okumbalwa okuncane okusiza ekugcineni:

  • Wehlise amahlombe akho, uvule umhlathi wakho. Sibamba ukushwabana kukho kokubili ngaphandle kokukubona, futhi ukukuxegisa kuthumela umlayezo osheshayo ubuyele ebuchosheni.
  • Beka izinyawo zakho zisike phansi uzwe umhlaba ngaphansi kwazo. Kukususa ekhanda lakho elijikelezayo kukubuyisele egumbini.
  • Fudumala uma ukwazi. Izandla ezibandayo nesifuba esiqinile kondla umkhosi. Amasekhondi ambalwa ngaphansi komshini owomisa izandla noma usonge indebe efudumele kungasusa udlame.

Akukho kulokhu okuwumlingo. Okwenzayo ukwehlisa ivolumu ngokwanele ukuze ingqondo yakho yangempela ibuyele online.

Bese ushintsha indaba oyixoxayo

Uma umzimba usuzolile kancane, ukuqondisa kabusha kocwaningo luka-Brooks kufanele ukwenze ngamabomu. Ngokuzwakalayo uma ukwazi, ngaphansi komoya wakho uma ungakwazi. "Ngijabule." "Lokhu kubalulekile kimi, futhi yingakho umzimba wami wenza lokhu." Kuzwakala kulula kakhulu ukuthi kusebenze. Kuyasebenza noma kunjalo, ngoba awuziqambeli amanga, uqamba ukuvuseleleka okufanayo ngokunembe kakhulu.

Kunesinyathelo esisiza njengaso: yeka ukuskena ukwahlulela kwezilaleli.

Uma sinovalo, siyakholwa ukuthi wonke umuntu uyakubona. Umjuluko, izandla ezithuthumelayo, izwi eliphukayo, ngokuqinisekile kusobala egumbini lonke. Izazi zengqondo zikubiza lokhu ngomphumela wesibani, futhi amashumi eminyaka ocwaningo abonisa ukuthi kuwuqhinga lwengqondo kakhulu. Sikweqisa ngokumangalisayo ukuthi abanye abantu baqaphela kangakanani ngathi, ngoba sibanjelwe emaphakathi olwazi lwethu futhi bona bamatasa emaphakathi lolwabo. Umenzi wenhlolokhono ucabanga ngomhlangano wakhe olandelayo. Izilaleli zicabanga ngesidlo sasemini, noma ngezinkathazo zazo, noma lutho nhlobo. Uvalo lwakho luxokozela kuwe futhi lucishe lungabonakali kubo.

Lelo qiniso elilodwa lisusa ingcindezi yangempela. Uma cishe kungekho okubona uvalo lwakho, awudingi ukuchitha amandla uwafihla. Ungaluvumela ukuthi luhambe kanye nawe bese ubeka ukunaka kwakho entweni ephambi kwakho kunalokho.

Kunoshintsho oluncane olusiza lapha, futhi lumayelana nokuthi amehlo akho aya kuphi, ngokoqobo nangokwengqondo. Ukukhathazeka kudonsela ukugxila kwakho ngaphakathi, ekushayeni kwenhliziyo yakho, ezandleni zakho ezithuthumelayo, ekhadini elihamba lezikolo zokuthi ucabanga uwenza kanjani. Ukusebenza kuhlala ohlangothini oluphambene. Beka ukunaka kwakho emsebenzini, embuzweni obuzwayo, emuntwini oyedwa ongemuva onqekuzayo, futhi kusale isikhala esincane sesijiko. Awukwazi ukugxila ngokugcwele kulokho okwenzayo futhi ugxile ngokugcwele ovalweni ngesikhathi esisodwa. Khetha ukwenza.

Umkhuba wamasekhondi angamashumi ayisishiyagalolunye ongencika kuwo

Uma usuvele unovalo yisona sikhathi esibi kunazo zonke sokuqamba icebo. Ngakho kusiza ukuba nelilungele, uchungechunge olufushane oluhambisa isikhathi ngasinye, ukuze umzuzu wokuqala omkhulu ungabi futhi isikhathi sokuqala ozama ngaso noma yikuphi kwalokhu. Nansi enye inguqulo. Yilungise kuze kube ngeyakho.

  1. Thola izinyawo zakho. Mana noma uhlale, ubeke zombili izinyawo, uzwe phansi. Cishe amasekhondi ayishumi okuqaphela nje umhlaba.
  2. Phefumula kude nangokucotha. Kane ngaphakathi, kayisithupha phandle, kane noma kahlanu. Vumela ukuphefumulela phandle kube okude.
  3. Xegisa ukushwabana okusobala. Wehlise amahlombe, uvule umhlathi, uvusa izandla kanye uma unesikhala.
  4. Sho ukuqondisa kabusha. Ngokuthulile noma ekhanda lakho: "Ngijabule. Lokhu kubalulekile." Kusho njengeqiniso, hhayi njengesifiso.
  5. Bheka phezulu naphandle. Susa amehlo akho emanothini akho nasemzimbeni wakho, uwabeke egumbini noma emnyango ozodlula kuwo.

Yonke into ingena cishe emzuzwini owodwa nohhafu, futhi akukho kuyo okudinga ubumfihlo noma amathuluzi. Yisebenzise emotweni, ephaseji, endlini yangasese, emaceleni esiteji. Inhloso akusona ukuzizwa uguqukile ekugcineni. Inhloso ukufika uzinze amazinga ambalwa, nokunaka kwakho kubheke phambili esikhundleni sokubheka ngaphakathi.

Ongakwenza ngekuseni, hhayi nje ngomzuzu

Imizuzu emihlanu yokugcina ihamba kangcono uma amahora angaphambi kwayo enze umsebenzi othile othule.

Yazi izinto zakho ngokwanele ukuze ungazidingi ziphelele. Ngokuqina kokuqonda kwakho lokho ongena kukho, yikho izinto ezimbalwa ubuchopho bakho obungabhekana novalo ngazo. Awudingi ukukhumbula igama ngalinye. Udinga ukwazi amasekhondi akho angamashumi amathathu okuqala kahle, ngoba isiqalo yilapho uvalo lufinyelela phezulu khona futhi ukuvula okunesiqiniseko kukuthengela isikhathi sokuthi okusele kuzinze.

Yenza kancane ngophethiloli. Isikhukhula sekhofi esiswini esingenalutho silingisa ukukhathazeka cishe ncamashi, ukuvevezela, inhliziyo egijimayo, lowo muzwa woshubile. Uma usuvele unyusiwe, inkomishi eyengeziwe iwukuthela uphethiloli phezu kwako. Yidla okuthile. Phuza amanzi.

Nyakazisa umzimba wakho ekuseni kwosuku uma ukwazi. Ukuhamba, izitebhisi ezimbalwa, noma yini ekwenza uphefumule kanzima kusha okunye ukushwabana okuqongelelwe ngaphambi kokuba kube nethuba lokuqongelela kube ukwesaba. I-Cleveland Clinic iphawula ukuthi ukuzivocavoca kukhipha amakhemikhali asiza ukwedlula impendulo yengcindezi, okuyingxenye yokuthi kungani abantu abazivocavoca ekuseni bevame ukuzizwa bezinze kakhudlwana bengena entambama enzima.

Futhi zinike isikhala sesikhathi. Ukugijimela ngasese sekwephuzile, ujuluka, ukhandekile ufuna igumbi elifanele, lokho kuqongelela uvalo phezu kovalo ngaphambi kokuba usuqalile. Ukufika kusenesikhathi ngokwanele ukuma nje umzuzu uphefumule kungenye yezinto ezingaziswa kancane ongazenzela wena-wesikhathi esizayo osuzoba sesimeni.

Umkhuba omncane ungabophezela konke lokho. Ukuphefumula okuthathu okufanayo, umusho ofanayo, indlela efanayo yokwenza amahlombe akho aqonde, okwenziwa ngaphambi kwawo wonke umzuzu omkhulu. Ukuphindaphinda yikho okwenza into izwakale ijwayelekile, futhi okujwayelekile kuphambene nokwesabekayo.

Uma imizuzu embalwa inganele

Kubantu abaningi, uvalo olujwayelekile ngaphambi komzuzu omkhulu luphendula kahle kukho konke lokhu. Uyaphefumula, uyaqondisa kabusha, ungene, futhi emva kwamasekhondi angamashumi amabili sewukhohlwe kakhulu ukuthi ubesaba.

Kwabanye abantu, kudlulela ngale. Uma ukwesaba kunamandla kangangokuthi udela amathuba, uphuma emakilasini, ushiya imisebenzi, noma ugwema noma yini lapho abantu bengakubuka khona, lokho kufanele ukuthathwe ngokungqongqo. Kuyafana nangovalo olugcwele, uhlobo lapho isifuba sakho sivaleka futhi uzizwa ngempela ungeke ukwazi ukuqhubeka nakho. Lokho akusona isici sobuntu futhi akusona okumele ukubekezelele wedwa.

Umeluleki osebenza nokukhathazeka kokusebenza noma kwenhlalo angasiza, ngokuvamile ngokushesha impela, ngezindlela ezihloliwe kahle ngalokhu ncamashi. Ukuzijwayeza kancane ezimeni eziphephile, ezinganobungozi obukhulu kuyingxenye enkulu yendlela lolo kwesaba oluxegisa ngayo ukubamba kwalo, futhi umeluleki omuhle angakwakha lokho nawe isinyathelo ngesinyathelo. Udokotela angakhipha noma yini yomzimba axoxe ngezinketho. Ukufinyelela akusho ukuthi ukuphefumula akuzange kusebenze noma ukuthi uphukile. Kusho ukuthi ungathanda ukungavumeli ukwesaba ukuthi kuqhubeke kunquma ukuthi wenzani.

Umzuzu omkhulu uyeza noma kunjalo. Uzowungena unokuncane okwengeziwe ohlangothini lwakho.

Imithombo

Ngaphambi kokuba uhambe: igama ngokunakekela

KEEP CALM inikeza amathuluzi amahhala, afundisayo, okuzisiza. Lokhu akuseluleko lwezokwelapha, ukuxilongwa, noma ukwelashwa, futhi akuthathi indawo yokunakekelwa uchwepheshe. Uma kukhona lapha okuzwakala kunzima kunengcindezi evamile, kuyisinyathelo esinamandla nesifanele ukuxhumana nochwepheshe.

If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, you are not alone. In the US, call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24/7), text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line), or call 911 in an emergency.