Ua ʻōlelo lākou ua paʻa ka pae uku. Ma muli o ka hui, he ʻoiaʻiʻo kēlā a i ʻole he maʻamau wale nō, akā e manaʻo kākou he ʻoiaʻiʻo loa ia. ʻAʻole e neʻe ana ka laina uku i kēia lā.
Lohe ka hapa nui a manaʻo ua pau ke kamaʻilio. ʻAʻole i pau, ua loli wale kona ʻano. He mea hoʻokahi ke kālā i loko o kekahi kuʻikahi me ʻumi a ʻumikumamālima mea, a ʻo nā mea ʻē aʻe, maʻalahi pinepine ka hāʻawi ʻana e ka mea ma kēlā ʻaoʻao o ka papa, no ka mea, ʻaʻole lākou e puka mai ana mai kekahi waihona kālā a haʻi e hoʻomalu ai.
Ka lā hoʻomaka. Ka inoa kūlana. Ka laulā hana. Nā ʻōlelo uku. Ka manawa loiloi. Nā mea hana. Nā lā hoʻomaha. Nā lā hana ma ka home. ʻO wai ka mea nāna e hana i ka hoʻomākaukau. Ka uku hoʻopaʻa palapala. Ka waihona kālā aʻo. He uku pale inā make ka papahana. He kālā maoli a he ola maoli kēlā me kēia o ia mau mea, ʻoi aku ka waiwai o kekahi ma mua o ka piʻi uku āu i hoʻopaʻapaʻa ai, a emi ka hapa nui i ka ʻaoʻao ʻē ma mua o ke kālā.
He aha kaʻu e noi ai ke ʻōlelo lākou ua paʻa ka pae uku?
E noi i loiloi kākau ʻia ma nā mahina ʻeono, i inoa kūlana e kūpono ana i ka hana, a i lā hoʻomaka e loaʻa ai iā ʻoe ʻelua pule kaʻawale. He pūlima wale nō ke kumu kūʻai o ia mau mea ʻekolu i ka mea ma kēlā ʻaoʻao, ʻaʻole he laina waihona kālā, a ʻo ka mea mua, he kamaʻilio uku hou ia āu i hoʻonohonoho mua ai.
Ma hope o kēlā, e hana i lalo o ka papa ma muli o kona waiwai maoli iā ʻoe. He kālā ka waihona kālā aʻo. He kālā nā mea hana. ʻO nā ʻōlelo uku he ʻumikumamāhā lā ma kahi o ke kanaono, he kālā ia āu i loaʻa mua ai, e hōʻea ana ʻoiai he pono kona. ʻO hoʻokahi lā o ka pule ma ka home, he huakaʻi kaʻa ʻoe e hana ʻole ai he kanahākumamālima manawa o ka makahiki. ʻO ka laulā hana i kākau ʻia, he pale ia i ka hoʻonui mālie e lilo ai ke kuʻikahi maikaʻi i kuʻikahi ʻino i Malaki.
Haʻi like ke aʻo a ka Harvard Business Review no ke kūkākūkā hana mai kekahi ʻaoʻao: ʻoi aku ka waiwai o ke kamaʻilio no ke kuleana, nā hana a me kahi e alakaʻi ai kēia, ʻaʻole no ka laina uku wale nō. He ʻōlelo hoʻokahi ka pae uku i loko o kekahi palapala me kanakolu ʻōlelo.
He aha nā kālepa emi loa iā lākou a waiwai loa iaʻu?
ʻO nā kālepa maikaʻi loa, ʻo ia nā mea e kau ai he pūlima wale nō iā lākou a ʻaʻohe kumu kūʻai iā ʻoe ke loaʻa. Ma ka papa kūlana o ka emi loa i ka ʻaoʻao ʻē: ka manawa loiloi, ka lā hoʻomaka, ka inoa kūlana, nā lā ma ka home, nā mea hana, ka waihona kālā aʻo, ka laulā hana i kākau ʻia, nā ʻōlelo uku, nā lā hoʻomaha, a me ka mea nāna e hana i ka hoʻomākaukau.
Eia ke kumu e paʻa ai kēlā papa. He mau loa, hoʻonui hou a ʻike ʻia e nā mea a pau i loko o ka pae ka piʻi uku, no laila ʻo ia ka mea pipiʻi loa āu e noi ai. ʻAʻohe kumu kūʻai o ka lā hoʻomaka. ʻAʻohe kumu kūʻai o ka inoa kūlana i ka hapa nui o nā hui, a he waiwai nui ia iā ʻoe ke ʻimi hou ʻoe i hana. ʻO ka loiloi ʻeono mahina, he kāhulu papa manawa wale nō i kēia manawa, a hoʻopanee ia i ka nīnau kālā a hiki i ka manawa e loaʻa ai iā ʻoe nā hōʻike.
Pono e kamaʻilio kūikawā ʻia nā ʻōlelo uku no ka poʻe hana kūʻokoʻa. ʻO ka uku ʻia ma nā lā he ʻumikumamāhā ma kahi o ke kanaono, ʻaʻole ia e hoʻololi iki i ka huina ma ka palapala uku, a hoʻololi nui naʻe ia i kou makahiki.
Pehea au e hoʻonoho ai i kaʻu ʻelima ma mua o ke kamaʻilio?
E kākau i ʻumi koho, e kāpae i ʻelima, a e hoʻonoho i ke koena ma muli o ko lākou waiwai iā ʻoe i loko o nā mahina ʻumikumamālua e hiki mai ana, ʻaʻole ma muli o ka mea e ʻike ʻia he wiwo ʻole ke noi. E hana i kēlā ma kekahi ʻauinalā mālie, no ka mea, ʻaʻole ʻoe e hoʻonoho papa ana i loko o ka lumi.
A laila, e hoʻoholo i ʻelua mea hou a e kākau i lalo. ʻO ka mea hoʻokahi āu e lawe ai inā hoʻokahi wale nō e loaʻa, a me ka mea āu e hāʻawi ʻoluʻolu ai ma mua ma ke ʻano he hāʻawi ʻike ʻia. ʻO ka loaʻa ʻana o kekahi mea āu e mākaukau ai e hāʻawi, ʻaʻole ia he nāwaliwali, ʻo ia ka mea e lilo ai ke kūʻē i kālepa.
Inā pili nā mea ʻelua, e mālama i ka mea e hauʻoli mau ai ʻoe i loko o hoʻokahi makahiki. Hoʻokiʻekiʻe nui ka poʻe i ka mea e ʻoluʻolu ai i ka Pōʻalima a hoʻohaʻahaʻa lākou i ka mea e hoʻoponopono mālie ana i nā mahina ʻumikumamālua e hiki mai ana, ʻo ia pinepine ka laulā hana, ka inoa kūlana a i ʻole ʻo wai kou luna.
E lawe i ka papa ma ka pepa. ʻAʻole no lākou e ʻike, no ʻoe wale nō. Maʻalahi ka hāmau ke loaʻa kekahi mea ma ka pākaukau e nānā ai, a ʻo ka papa i hoʻonoho ʻia, ʻo ia hoʻi ke heluhelu nei ʻoe i ka hāmau, ʻaʻole ke haku wale nei ʻoe.
Pehea au e kālepa ai me ka lilo ʻole i hoʻopaʻapaʻa kumu kūʻai?
E hoʻopili i kēlā me kēia hāʻawi i kekahi loaʻa, i loko o ka ʻōlelo hoʻokahi, ma ka leo nui. "Inā ua paʻa maoli ka uku, a laila pono iaʻu ka loiloi ʻeono mahina i kākau ʻia i loko o ka palapala, a me ka inoa kūlana kiʻekiʻe mai ka lā mua, a me ia mau mea ʻelua, mākaukau au e pūlima i kēia pule."
ʻO ia ka hana holoʻokoʻa. E kālepa, mai hāʻawi wale: pono e loaʻa kekahi mea no kēlā me kēia hāʻawi. Ua wehewehe pololei ka Program on Negotiation no ke kumu koʻikoʻi o kēia. Inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e haʻi i ka mea āu e hāʻawi nei a me ka mea āu e makemake ai ma hope, ʻaʻole e ʻike ka ʻaoʻao ʻē i kāu hāʻawi, a e loaʻa iā ʻoe kekahi mea ʻaʻohe kumu kūʻai iā lākou a ʻaʻohe pono iā ʻoe.
E mālama i ka leo pumehana a me ka ʻōlelo pōkole. ʻAʻole ʻoe e hoʻopaʻapaʻa nei, ke hui pū nei ʻoe i kekahi ʻano kuʻikahi hiki i nā mea ʻelua ke pūlima. ʻO ka ʻōlelo e mālama ai i ka hana like, ʻo ia "pehea kākou e hōʻea ai i ka ʻae", a ʻo ka ʻōlelo e luku ai, ʻo ia kekahi ʻano o "ʻaʻole lawa kēlā".
E kālepa i hoʻokahi i kēlā me kēia manawa, ma ka papa, a e pau ke lawa. He mālie ka hana i lalo o ka papa i hoʻonoho ʻia. ʻO ka wehe hou ʻana i kekahi mea i hoʻoholo ʻia no kou noʻonoʻo hou i loko o ke kaʻa, ʻaʻole ia he mālie.
Inā ʻaʻohe kālepa i loaʻa?
A laila, ua aʻo ʻoe i kekahi mea waiwai, ʻaʻole he mea ʻole. ʻO ka hui hiki ʻole ke neʻe ma ka uku, ka inoa kūlana, ka manawa, nā mea hana a i ʻole ka lā loiloi, ke haʻi mai nei ia iā ʻoe ʻaʻohe wahi kaʻawale ona a i ʻole ʻaʻole nui kona makemake e ʻimi, a he mau ʻoiaʻiʻo koʻikoʻi kēlā ma mua o kāu ʻae ʻana.
Ma laila, ʻekolu koho ʻoiaʻiʻo kāu. E ʻae i ke kuʻikahi e like me kona ʻano me nā maka hāmama a me kahi lā ma kāu papa manawa ponoʻī e nānā hou ai. E ʻae me hoʻokahi mea āu i noi ai e kākau ʻia, ʻoiai he mea liʻiliʻi, no ka mea, ʻo ka mea i kākau ʻia, he kumu hoʻohālike ia. A i ʻole e hōʻole me ka pumehana a waiho hāmama i ka puka, a he koho maoli kēlā i nā manawa he nui aku ma mua o kou manaʻo.
ʻO kāu koho, e kākau i ka mea āu i noi ai a me ka mea i pane ʻia mai, i ka lā like, ma kā lākou ʻōlelo. ʻO ia palapala ka hoʻomaka o kāu kūkākūkā i kēlā makahiki aʻe. Mālama ia iā ʻoe mai ka hoʻomaka hou ʻana i ke kamaʻilio holoʻokoʻa i ke kakahiaka e wehe hou ai ka pae uku, a ʻo ia ka ʻokoʻa ma waena o ke noi hou a me ke noi hou me ka moʻolelo.
He mālie i hoʻomākaukau mua ʻia ka papa i hoʻonoho ʻia
ʻO ke kumu e hāʻule ai ka poʻe ma nā kālepa, ʻaʻole no ka nele o ka wiwo ʻole. Ke haku nei lākou i nā koho i ke ola ʻoiai ke kali nei kekahi, a ʻo ka haku ʻana ma lalo o ke kaomi, hoʻopuka ia i nā noi liʻiliʻi mihi. Wehe ka ʻumi minuke me ka peni i ka lā ma mua i ka hapa nui o kēlā.
ʻO ia ke kumu o ka mālie i loko o ke kūkākūkā. ʻAʻole ia he manaʻo āu e kāhea ai i loko o ka lumi, akā he pūʻulu hoʻoholo āu i hana ai i ka wā ʻaʻohe mea koʻikoʻi, i hana wale ka mea o ʻoe e noho ana ma ka papa i ka hapa maʻalahi: ka heluhelu papa, ke kālepa ma ka papa, a me ka noho ʻoluʻolu no ka hana pū i ka Pōʻakahi.
E kākau i kāu ʻumi i kēia pō. E kāpae i ʻelima. E helu i ke koena. A laila, e noi i nā mea a pau, ma ka papa, me ka pumehana, a e nānā i ka nui o ka pae "paʻa" e hiki ai ke neʻe ma nā wahi a pau koe wale nō ka laina hoʻokahi a lākou i haʻi mai ai iā ʻoe.
Nā kumu
- Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School, Expanding the Pie: Integrative versus Distributive Bargaining Negotiation Strategies
- Harvard Business Review, Negotiating Your Next Job
- Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School, Four Strategies for Making Concessions in Negotiation