He akamai ʻoe i kāu hana a manaʻo pono ʻoe e uku pono ʻia no ia hana. No laila, ke haʻalele ai ka helu o kekahi hoa hana i ka ʻaina awakea a ʻoi aku ia ma mua o kou, no ka hana e like loa me kāu, ʻo ka mea kūpono e ʻike ai, ua hāʻawi ʻia mai iā ʻoe kekahi mea waiwai. Hala nā makahiki o ka hapa nui o ka poʻe me ka loaʻa ʻole o hoʻokahi kiko ʻikepili hilinaʻi no ka waiwai maoli o kā lākou hana, a ua loaʻa kāu me ka uku ʻole, ma luna o kahi ʻaina awakea, mai kekahi kanaka i lawe i kahi pilikia liʻiliʻi e ʻōlelo leo nui ai.
He ʻoiaʻiʻo ka manaʻo i loko o kou umauma a e hala ana nō ia. ʻAʻole naʻe e hala ka helu ke kākau ʻoe iā ia. ʻO ka mea e hiki mai ana, he hana papa ia, ʻaʻole he manaʻo wale, a hoʻomaka ia i kēia ʻauinalā, ʻaʻole i loko o ʻekolu pule, i ka wā i pau ai ka ʻeha a ʻaʻohe mea i loli.
ʻOi aku ka uku o koʻu hoa hana no ka hana like. He aha kaʻu e hana mua ai?
E kākau i kā lākou helu i kēia lā, me ko lākou kūlana hana, ko lākou mau makahiki hana, a me ka lā. ʻO ia ke kiko mua o kahi pae uku āu e kūkulu nei, a ʻo ka pae uku ka mea āu e noi ai ma hope.
E hana i kēia ma mua o nā mea a pau, no ka mea, pau koke ka helu, ʻaʻole naʻe ka manaʻo. I loko o hoʻokahi pule, e hoʻomanaʻo ʻoe ua ʻoi aku, akā ua nalowale nā huahelu. Ma ka pepa, ma ka ʻaoʻao o kahi kūlana hana a me kahi lā, lilo ia i hōʻike. I loko o kou poʻo, noho ia he hoʻopiʻi, a ʻaʻole ola nā hoʻopiʻi i loko o kahi kūkākūkā uku.
E kākau pū i ka mea āu e ʻike ai no ke ʻano o kā lākou hana, ma hoʻokahi lālani: he aha kā lākou e mālama nei, iā wai lākou e hōʻike ai, a pehea ka lōʻihi o kā lākou hana ʻana. ʻAʻole ʻoe e kūkulu nei i kahi hoʻopiʻi kūʻē i kekahi, ke kūkulu nei ʻoe i kahi hoʻohālikelike e kūpaʻa ai ke pale mai kekahi luna, a ʻaʻole kūpaʻa nā hoʻohālikelike pohihihi.
A laila e pani i ka puke. ʻAʻole ʻoe e hoʻoholo ana i kēia ʻauinalā. Ke hōʻiliʻili nei ʻoe.
Pehea wau e hala ai i ke koena o ka ʻauinalā?
E kū aʻe a e hele wāwae no he ʻumi minuke, e hanu lōʻihi aʻe i waho ma mua o kou hanu i loko, a mai hoʻouna i kekahi mea i kekahi kanaka. Ua hoʻāʻo nā kānaka noiʻi ma Stanford i kēlā hanu i kaulike kaumaha i waho no ʻelima minuke o ka lā i loko o hoʻokahi mahina, a ua ʻike lākou ua hāpai aʻe ia i ka manaʻo ma mua o ka noʻonoʻo mālie ʻana, he hoʻihoʻi nui ia mai kahi kauoha kino liʻiliʻi loa. He pane hoʻohālikelike ka manaʻo, he leo nui kona, a e pau ia ke hōʻole ʻoe e hānai iā ia.
ʻO ka mea āu e pale ai iā ʻoe iho, ʻo ia ke ʻano pane wikiwiki o kēia: ka leka i ka hoaaloha e kiʻi ʻia ana ke kiʻi, ka pane huhū i ka hoa hana nāna i haʻi iā ʻoe, ka palapala haʻalele hana i kākau ʻia i ka hā o ka ʻauinalā a e hoʻihoʻi ʻoe i ka ʻeiwa o ke kakahiaka aʻe. ʻAʻohe mea āu e hoʻouna ai i kēia lā e ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ma mua o ka mea hoʻokahi i hoʻouna ʻia i ka Pōʻakahi, a ʻoi aku ka ʻino o ka nui o ia mau mea.
Ke haʻi ʻia iā ʻoe ka uku o kekahi, kau pinepine ia ma ke ʻano he hoʻoholo hopena no kāu hana ʻana, a hewa kēlā heluhelu ʻana ma nā ʻoiaʻiʻo. Hoʻonoho ʻia nā uku e ka wā i hoʻolimalima ʻia ai ʻoe, ka mea āu i noi ai i kēlā manawa, ka hui i loaʻa ke kālā i kēlā hapahā, a me ka neʻe ʻana o ka mākeke i ka mahina i pūlima ai kekahi i kahi pepa. He ʻikepili no ka mākeke ka uku o kekahi kanaka ʻē, ʻaʻole ia he hoʻoholo hopena nou.
Pehea wau e hoʻolilo ai i hoʻokahi helu i pae uku kūpono e noi ai?
E kiʻi i ʻelua kiko ʻikepili hou no ke kūlana hana like a me ka wahi like, a laila e lawe i ke kiʻekiʻe o nā mea ʻekolu i pahuhopu nou. He moʻolelo hoʻokahi helu, he kuʻia ʻelua, a he uku mākeke ʻekolu hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻōlelo leo nui me ka haʻalulu ʻole o kou leo.
Eia kahi e loaʻa ai nā mea ʻelua i koe, ma ka papa e holo maoli ai. ʻO ka poʻe āu i ʻike mua ai e hana ana i kāu hana ma kahi ʻē, e nīnau pololei, no ka mea, e haʻi mai ka hapa nui o ka poʻe ke haʻi mua ʻoe i kou. ʻO nā pae uku lehulehu ma nā hoʻolaha hana no kāu kūlana, ma nā wahi a nā mea hoʻolimalima e hoʻolaha ai, a ʻo ia ke kumu ʻoluʻolu loa. ʻO nā mea ʻimi limahana, e hāʻawi mai lākou i kahi pae uku i loko o hoʻokahi kelepona a ua uku ʻia lākou e ʻike. A ʻo kēlā me kēia ʻikepili uku i paʻi ʻia no kāu ʻoihana a me kou ʻāina, he manuahi ka heluhelu a e pale ia iā ʻoe mai ka lele loa ʻana ma waho.
A laila e hoʻonoho i kahi lā. ʻO ka hemahema maʻamau loa ma ʻaneʻi, ʻaʻole ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o ka helu hewa, ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o ka helu pololei a hana ʻole i kekahi mea me ia no hoʻokahi makahiki. E kau i ka noi i loko o kekahi pule kikoʻī, ma ka palapala, ma mua o ka pau ʻana o ka manaʻo, no ka mea, ʻo ka manaʻo ka wahie a ʻaʻole mālama lōʻihi ʻia ka wahie.
Inā he kumu maoli ko ko lākou uku nui aʻe?
I kekahi manawa aia nō, a he hopena maikaʻi ka ʻike ʻana, ʻaʻole he hopena ʻino. Ua ʻoi paha ka laulā o kā lākou hana ma mua o kāu, he uku mākeke paha no kahi mākaukau kakaʻikahi, a i ʻole he kūkākūkā uku i ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o kā lākou holo ʻana ma mua o kāu, a haʻi kēlā me kēia o ia mau mea iā ʻoe i ka mea e hana ai ma hope.
Ua ʻike kekahi hoʻokolohua kahua i paʻi ʻia e ka National Bureau of Economic Research, he nui nā kuhi hewa o ka poʻe no ka uku o ko lākou mau luna, a he liʻiliʻi aʻe akā he maoli nō nā kuhi hewa no ko lākou mau hoa hana, a ʻokoʻa nā ʻaoʻao ʻelua. Ua liʻiliʻi paha ka hakahaka āu e noʻonoʻo nei ma mua o kona ʻano, a ua nui loa aʻe paha. ʻAʻole hiki ke ʻike ʻia kekahi o lāua mai hoʻokahi ʻaina awakea.
ʻO ka mea kūpono e hana ai, ke ʻike ʻoe i ka mea maoli, ʻo ia ka nīnau e hoʻolilo ai iā ia i hoʻolālā: he aha kaʻu e pono ai ke hana i like ai koʻu helu me ko lākou. Inā ʻo ka laulā ka pane, e noi i ka laulā. Inā he mākaukau, e kākau inoa no ka papa aʻo. Inā he kūkākūkā, e kūkākūkā. Hiki ke hana ʻia kēlā me kēia ʻano o kēlā pane, a ʻo ia ke kumu e ʻoi aku ai ka maikaʻi o ka loaʻa ʻana o kahi kumu maoli ma mua o ka loaʻa ʻole.
Aia pū ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole paha ʻoe i noi iki. Kūpono ke ʻōlelo ʻia me ka hilahila ʻole, no ka mea, ʻo ia ke ʻano maʻalahi loa e hoʻoponopono ʻia ai o kēia moʻolelo. ʻAʻole uku ʻia ka poʻe e like me ko lākou waiwai, uku ʻia lākou e like me ka mea i ʻaelike ʻia, a ʻo ka ʻaelike he kūkākūkā ia i hoʻomaka ʻia e kekahi. I kēia makahiki, ʻo ʻoe ke kanaka nāna e hoʻomaka.
E lilo i kanaka e ʻōlelo leo nui i ka helu
Ua haʻi mai kekahi iā ʻoe i kāna uku, me ka lawe ʻana i kekahi pilikia nona iho, a ʻo ia paha ka mea kūpono loa i hiki mai i kāu ʻoihana i kēia makahiki holoʻokoʻa. ʻO ka manaʻo pololei i kēlā kanaka, he mahalo, ʻaʻole he hoʻohālikelike, a kūpono ke hoʻomaopopo ʻia ma mua o ka pau ʻana o ka ʻauinalā.
A laila e hana like aku, no ka mea, ʻo ia ke ala wikiwiki loa e hāpai ai i ka pae uku a lākou e ana ai iā ʻoe. ʻO ka poʻe i ʻike i ka waiwai o ka hana, noi lākou i ka nui aʻe, loaʻa iā lākou ka nui aʻe, a huki lākou i ka pae uku i luna ma hope o lākou. ʻO ka poʻe ʻike ʻole, ʻae lākou i ka hāʻawi mua a paʻa ka pae uku i lalo no nā mea a pau. ʻO ka mea o ia mau mea e hiki mai ana ma kou wahi hana i loko o nā makahiki ʻelima e hiki mai ana, hoʻoholo ʻia ia e ka ʻōlelo leo nui ʻana paha o kekahi i kahi helu maoli, a ʻo ʻoe kekahi hiki i kēia manawa.
ʻElua rula e lilo ai ia i hana a ʻaʻole i manaʻo wale. E hāʻawi i kou helu ponoʻī a ʻaʻole ko kekahi kanaka ʻē, no ka mea, na kēlā kanaka e hāʻawi i kāna. A e hāʻawi i ke kanaka e kōkua ʻia ai, me ka mālie, ʻaʻole i ka lumi holoʻokoʻa. Hōʻike ka noiʻi no ka pale ʻana i ka ʻike, e hōʻole ka poʻe i ka ʻike kūpono a manuahi ke lawe paha ia i kahi hoʻoholo hopena, no laila pono pinepine ka hāʻawi ʻana mai ou aku, ʻaʻole ma ka noi ʻia mai.
ʻAʻohe kuleana paʻa i loko o kēia mau mea, ʻaʻohe hoʻi hewa no ka noho mālie ʻana. Ua paʻakikī kou ʻauinalā a ua ʻae ʻia ʻoe e hoʻolilo iā ia i kāu mau helu ponoʻī. Akā ke hoʻonoho ʻia nei ka pae uku āu e noi ai i kēlā makahiki aʻe i kēia manawa pono, e ka poʻe e kamaʻilio nei a e kamaʻilio ʻole nei, a ʻo hoʻokahi ʻōlelo maʻalahi mai ou aku e neʻe ʻoi aku ia ma mua o ka manaʻolana wale e ʻike mai ka mākeke.
Nā kumu
- National Bureau of Economic Research, How Much Does Your Boss Make? The Effects of Salary Comparisons
- American Economic Association, Journal of Economic Literature, Information Avoidance
- Stanford Medicine, 'Cyclic sighing' can help breathe away anxiety